Mind Game

This journey is a total mind game. Like I said yesterday, I had my own ideas of how fast I was going to lose weight. I’m losing…but I’m not losing 20-40 pounds a month.

I had all kinds of ideas of meeting goal by May (at the latest, haha), ready for a swimsuit (like really ready instead of needing for a trip) and it was going to be great. For the record, I probably won’t meet May either. It’s okay.

I’ve been pretty good at listening to my body for a while, usually, it says things like go get a massage or a pedicure but it also has told me when my diet was ineffective – I’ve learned to listen more after surgery.

It’s generally frowned upon, but I weigh everyday. As little as I eat, if I go up more than a pound or two, I know it’s not working and it’s time to revamp. There are natural fluctuations (and they still suck when you want to see a downward trend and it goes up). I don’t get too worked up, I think about the day before and try to make adjustments for the upcoming day.

It’s a struggle to figure out what to do with the information available (and I am so thankful for it even though sometimes I’m irritated by it). Everyone has an opinion. My body does not like it if I cut carbs out. (Not gonna lie…I’m glad for that…). I don’t eat many and most come from the milk for my shakes…but everything works better with carbs. Listening to your body is key to it all.

I know I’m doing okay. I have a lot of support by people I see often. I also am bolstered by people I haven’t seen for a while, who didn’t know about the surgery and their reactions. One of those was today. It was a great visit…and it felt good to think about how far I’d come since she last saw me.

Thanks for joining me on this journey.


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